The Lying Never Ends

Turns out lying to your younger brother never really passes. Here's an msn conversation I just had. And, by the way, if I ever open a conversation up with "to be totally honest" I'm probably lying to you from then on.

Stuart : yeh i heard
  > nice
  > how much is it to go to the zoo
  > i want to go
Hugh : i don't know. prolly like 10 bucks or something
Stuart : FOR ALL THOSE ANIMALS?!? THATS A DEAL!!!!!!
Hugh : well, maybe it's more i don't know.
Stuart : well i think jen and i will come down to check out those so called monkey's
Hugh : lissen, i'll be totally honest with you.
  > the animals were sold years ago to labs.
  > it's all animatronics now.
  > and hand puppets.
Stuart : hahaha
Hugh : and guys in costumes.
  > like the rhino.
  > two guys. i swear
Stuart : midgets in iguana suits
Hugh : yeah
  > i think the rhino guys went brokeback mountain a little while ago too.
  > it's been doing weird shit.
Stuart : nice

Futility at its Best. God Bless You, Summer!

Two things;

Leaf blowers. I could care less about noise, but what exactly happened to raking and bagging your lawn detritus? All you do with a leaf blower is push your leaves to the side of your lawn. Or, more commonly, onto the road. Pick up a rake, you lazy so and so.

Washing your sidewalk. Perhaps the worst of the two. I've watched people wash their driveways and sidewalks of leaves and twigs, etc. I have two things to say to that; That's NOT conserving water at all!!! and BUY A BROOM!!! Your driveway and sidewalk don't need washing, they need sweeping.

It's bad enough I used to live in Little Italy where watering your lawn during the hottest part of the day for an hour or more was more a lifestyle choice than just a bad idea. Hint: water evaporates quicker in the middle of the day, so you must water your lawn more. Water it early morning or late evening so the grass has a chance to draw the water in. You'll require less water.

Then we won't have so many water conservancy advisories.

Jerk.

Two Sites Worth Checking Out

Flash is pretty pervasive on this here "interweb". Which is great for me, since I use Flash as my bread and butter. Of course, the last time I spent a grand on a loaf of bread, I also picked up some nice magic beans.

Anyway, yesterday I was sent a viral made by some UK shop for Mini



'ave a word

Well done, well executed. They use variables to stitch together custom video with scripted video, the speech is all about the recipient not being manly enough for a Mini. I can't even imagine how long it took them to record the various names. 'Ello Hugh.

It's a great touch, though, and a fun five minutes.

Another site making the rounds is Philips' Shave Everywhere . Another good use of video with a good actor. Complete with beeps and honks for the bad words accompanied by imagery of phallic fruit, this robed spokesperson takes you through a high level look at the site name and just how perfectly the razor in question will help you achieve it.

Panhandler Pandemonium

This morning a girl approached me asking if I could spare "anything so I can eat." Before I could answer, she followed up with, "I'm 17, my ex beat me (she had visible beatin's on her face), I'm out on the street, anything?"

I actually checked my pockets and realizing all I had were bills that I wasn't willing to part with, I said, "No sorry"

After complimenting me on my "ink" and walking away she turned and said, "Working hard or hardly working?" To which I replied, "Working hard." Her response? "Try hardly working, it's more fun."

Now comes my callous moment, "Really? I can pay for my food. That seems like fun to me."

That seemed to give her the correct impression of my opinion of "bumming for change" and she walked away.

Not that I don't give money to homeless types, but i'm usually a lot more generous to old timers. They've lived hard and earned a buck from me in my opinion. But a 17 year old? Not a chance.

You're not "sticking it to The Man", by the way. You're sticking it to yourself. "The Man" goes home to his three car garage, eats a nice, fat steak, watches pay-per-view on a giant tv and goes to sleep on a bed of money. He doesn't give a rat's ass you're not working.

New Mac Ads

I've been a Mac guy since high school...good...god...fourteen years ago...

Ok, I'm a little freaked out now. Just enjoy the ads while I curl up into a ball and rock a little.

Weird Spam

I got a weird spam email today this is a copy paste;

somewhere-somewhere far away from this building where the old bastard was
two months' pay!"
the alhatross? Why don't you eat? Son, you're bone and feathers!"

===== Your cre dit doesn't matter to us! If you OWN real es tate
and want IMMEDIATE ca sh to spend ANY way you like, or simply wish
to LOWER your monthly payme nts by a third or more, here are the deals
we have TODAY (hurry, these of fers will expi re TONIGHT):

Simply fill out this one minute form...


Visit us


among the rocks and rubble stood a bulldozer, its lowered bucket jammed
scientist, aren't you drawn to dealing with the extraterrestrial treasures
and it was even nicer to drink now than alcohol. It smelled of home. Of
haven't forgotten that I like a drink before dinner, I hope?"
for the flood of the green stuff to drip past them and disappear into the
"Want some?" he offered, wiping the neck of the flask. "For courage?"

How frigging weird is that???

Working On

Still doing a lot of banners for Fjord. Meh.

However, I am working on a brand video editor for Lucky Charms. Very exciting!

This is in addition to video editors for Biohazard, Players, a music mixer for Pringles. Hooah!

Lack of Posts

I know I've been reticent in posting to the blog recently. For the first half of this year really. I do have what I think are good explanations for why, but they never sound quite right when I say them out loud.

I've had a nasty bout of creative block (every aspect of creativity, actually) and have had a hard time busting out of it. I feel as though it's about to crest and I'm looking forward to being excited about something that doesn't involve the baby in my girlfriend's belly. Not to say that it's wrong to be excited about it, but my contribution is done in that regard.

So here are some things I'm checking out recently;

T-shirts are really starting to draw me in. A good print on a shirt can give me just about as much inspiration as a good book or movie. Now I just need to talk someone into letting do print tests for free (or at least free table time somewhere)

I have a really shitty digital video camera which I haven't used in a really long time. My friend (more acquaintance but whatev) Brendan Dawes has started a site called Inspireme.tv. Now I want to dig out my camera and do something, so that's good.

And speaking of cams, check out Grant Skinner's incomplet.org and Craig Swann's webcamtastic.com

While at FiTC my buddy, Geoff Lillemon gave me a limited edition print he'd done. I was really appreciative and Geoff is one of those rare talents that thankfully hasn't gone unnoticed. Makes me want to explore screen-printing. Something I never did in school. Of course, that's nearly a decade ago, so I don't have an excuse anymore.

My friend, U.N.I.D is helping me with an idea I had earlier in the spring. Well, to be honest, he's executing the idea for me. I'm still in a creative funk so I'm not helping him too much. Ah well.

This is about all I can manage right now since I really need to get back to work.